Momus – The Ephebophobe

From the album ‘Bambi‘ (2013).


I’m accused of failing to lust after
Girls in their mid- to late- teens
In Zurich in 2046 this is seriously frowned upon
They have labelled me “the ephebophobe”
And taken the chip from my brain
And until I respond appropriately
I can’t use Google again

Post-pubescent sexpots
Are lounging all day at my door
Wearing unfeasible hotpants
To tease out my desire
And I will not be a good citizen
‘Til my ephebophobia’s gone
Until I screw these sex kittens
I won’t use Google again

O upstanding people of Zurich
Your punishment makes me sad
If I can’t use Google Image Search
Things are going to get bad
Beehives, antheaps and seedheads
Are things I need to see
If a trypophile doesn’t see these things
He could die in custody

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